Portland Bike

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City Refuses to invite Professional Bike Blogger to Important Meeting

By Johnny Ratt

Portland held a secret meeting today to discuss the Central City in Motion project, however neglected to invite very important and influential bike blogger, Johnny Ratt (full disclosure: that's me). Said bike blogger was quoted in saying:

This is very unfortunate for the people of Portland to not have had me included in this secret meeting. I am quite upset about it, as I suffer from a clinical case of FOMO.

Portland's Central City in Motion plan aims to make downtown Portland more friendly towards cars by forcing bikers onto sidepaths to allow for increased car travel. Planning has been in the works since late 2012. The reason for the delay is that planners could not agree on what color the cover should be. When they finally decided on green in early 2015, the process of sending PBOT officials on fancy vacations to Copenhagen to "study bike infrastructure" began. In February of 2016, the manager in charge of this project was fired for allegedly playing Justin Bieber music too loudly. This brings us to today where planning has finally started, however I was not invited so nya nya nya.

It is complete mystery as to what was discussed at this meeting since the bike blogger (full disclosure: still me) was not invited, however I will speculate anyway. The city likely was presented with a map of the Central City and asked to mark on the map where they would like to install fun emoji-inspired bike lane markings. Portland has a decided lack of whimsy in its bike infrastructure, so it is important to tackle this issue first. They then moved on to discussing how many parking spaces would be acceptable to remove for this project and came to the conclusion that zero is the only option, as this is in line with PBOT's Vision Zero initiative.

Stay tuned here for further updates.

Central City in Motion Project to be Boon for Cars

By Johnny Ratt

Portland's Central City in Motion project is well underway. This project aims to prioritize getting bikers and bus riders out of the way for cars, and is quickly making its way through planning commissions. PBOT's ambitious plans will transform the Central City from a space friendly to bikers to one that eases traffic congestion for private automobiles. The Transportation Bureau aims to do this by carving out separate-but-equal space for bikers to go so that they are unable to slow down traffic.

Braden Blick, a resident of downtown aggress with PBOT's plans.

I think this will greatly improve travel downtown. Finding parking is a constant struggle for me because of all the bikes, and getting them out of the way for my car will greatly improve my quality of life. Who even rides bikes anyway, those are for kids and scofflaws! Some of us have jobs to go to, you know!

Dianna Durgan, a representative for the Business Allies of Portland thinks the plan will help Portland's struggling downtown businesses.

Everyone knows Portland's bike-friendliness is hurting our businesses. The city's insistence on allowing bikes on our crowded downtown streets is a big reason why downtown is struggling as much as it is. This plan will literally and figuratively put bikers in their place, and allow real people to support our local downtown businesses.

Make sure to follow us here for more coverage as the city continues to refine and improve the Central City in Motion plan